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Dealing with Difficult Situations and People

 

This free sample is one of the many terrific courses you will find in The Training Bank's Management Development System.

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Below is a model you can use to handle those situations.
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Define the problem in behavioral terms

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What could be the cause?

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Could I be contributing?

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How should I respond?
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Define the problem in behavioral terms

The first thing you need to do is figure out what the problem is. This sounds obvious, but many people make the mistake of trying to deal with "symptoms" and not the root cause of a problem.

For instance, suppose you work as a computer developer. A coworker is suppose to conduct unit testing of your code before it goes to production. The two of you do not get along. She thinks you're bossy. You think she is too opinionated and won't listen to suggestions. When problem code gets put into production the finger pointing starts. You both decide to implement a sign-off sheet so each person has to sign off that they reviewed the code. All you've done is add extra administration without addressing the real problem - the two of you can't work effectively as a team.

Another mistake is to define interpersonal problems in terms of personality. "He's just a negative person by nature." "She's not a team player." You've got to define, in specific behavioral terms. What is it specifically that you or someone else is doing that causing the problem?
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What could be the cause?

Usually there's not just one root cause for performance or interpersonal problems, but rather an interaction of several. Brainstorm factors you think are involved - some may be environmental (i.e. manager is unaware of the situation and is inadvertently allowing it) or individual (employee does not pitch in when help is needed). You'll have a chance to validate these later.
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Could I be contributing?

This is one of the most important factors when trying to address an interpersonal problem at work If you're involved in a problem situation you must be able to do an honest appraisal of how you may have contributed to a particular problem. If you find you're contributing to the problem and you make an effort to change, others will do the same.
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How should I respond?

Outline a specific sequence of actions you can take to address the situation. Document your decision so you can refer to it and critique yourself. Be sure you include in your response:

 
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a clear description of the behaviors contributing to the problem situation (including your own involvement)
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specific examples of the behavior
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an explanation of the impact this situation is having on productivity, service or other employees
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a suggestion for next steps

Of course, your first response to any problem could be to go to your manager. But that's not always the best response and it wouldn't do much for your reputation. Managers recognize employees who can take a situation into their own hands and act. In fact, the module on Adaptive Leadership talks about how you can sharpen your ability to do just that.
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Let's look at this framework in action. The next section provides some common work place situations and walks them through the "Difficult Situation" framework. Review them so the next time you're facing one you can respond - not react!
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